Read introduction

'A Calf Love Crisis' existed in its original form as a song written when I was around 19 in memory of an early love of mine, an especially painful case of young or calf love suffered during swimming classes in West London as I remember it, before being reworked in 2003, and then again in 2015.

A Calf Love Crisis

Def._2020_110_by Carl Halling12 Apr 2016

I couldn't be more sure
Of all the nostalgia I'd endure,
If I were to explore
A calf love crisis
That was so hard to cure,

How your mummy, she knew mine,
They'd been friends
For a little time,
Like the time that you explained,
Your first name, it was Jane.

I really loved you, Jane,
Though you only gave me pain,
You were the girl
Who said hello the first,
But it only ended for the worse.

In our local swimming pool,
I swam so close to you,
Did you smirk
To your bob-haired friend,
Between the deep and shallow end?

So I just shyly slinked away,
Feeling such a fool that day,
Pet Clark reinforced
My bitter woe,
Singing 'My Love' on the radio.

I really loved you, Jane,
Though you only gave me pain,
You were the girl
Who said hello the first,
But it only ended for the worse.

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