You Aren't Even on the Radar

10600587_10204764587811044_3323353174422219428_nby Devin Mitchell Durbin06 Sep 2013

Who cares about the way you look,
The way you dress
The way that you express
Yourself is your business.
Oh, but they’re staring at you,
Are they staring at you?
They’re laughing, it must be you.
It has to be you.
No one else out here fucks up
Quite like you do.
It must be that new hairdo.

Maybe it’s that music
That speaks to your soul.
Why do they listen to rap
When they could listen to rock n’ roll.
You think, judging them,
Wishing they wouldn’t judge you.
While silently you judge them.

They don’t even care,
But they must because you do;
Standing out like a sore thumb
With a big “kick me” sign on your back
Saying “Hello world, pick on me.
I already don’t have self esteem.
I have no friends, so kick me down
Not like someone’s gonna push you down.
Make me scream, make me cry,
Maybe I won’t eat for a week,
And maybe I’ll die.
Maybe that last word will cut me out
Of this life and throw me into the next.”

They don’t see you,
Maybe in passing, they got their own problems.
They may laugh, but they ain’t judging,
Maybe you reminded them of something funny.
Or maybe you just made eye contact at the wrong time
Because nine times out of ten,
They didn’t even see you coming.
They see you staring, and maybe they go running,
Thinking the same kinds of things
You keep assuming they’re saying.
“Dad, doesn’t love me.
Didn’t even come to the big game.
Girlfriend just wants to have sex;
I’ve got to be a man or she’ll leave me.
That kid is staring at me,
Do I got something in my teeth.
Did I forget to use deodorant,
Have I done laundry this week?
It’s my face, that scar,
I’m bruised, finally away from my
Abusive mother, who wished I’d had of died.”

You can’t judge the face,
If you don’t know the name,
And where they’ve come from.
Promise you this, they’ll forget about you,
So why don’t you forget about them.
Stop silently judging,
Stop thinking you’re the center of the Universe;
You might be the center of yours,
But other people have their own problems.
You aren’t even on the radar.