Playing God

10600587_10204764587811044_3323353174422219428_nby Devin Mitchell Durbin12 Jan 2014

I don't think I get it
I don't think I'll get it
I don't think I have
What it takes
To shake my inhibitions
Look you in the eye
And tell you
The words that we've begun
To speculate due to peer pressure
Where you are soaring ever higher
I'm still here wallowing in my own feces
And living lie, after lie, after lie
And I swear that I love you
And continue to lie.

It's persistently on the tip
The tip of the tongue
The tip of the iceberg
10,000 feet in the air
And I still feel it
Like I don't even care
I am reaching the heavens
But I only feel further away
Falling faster through the air
And losing all thought
And ground
No hope anywhere but what is on my mind
As I stare into the darkness
And look at all the lights
As I look into the abyss
And wonder violently in my head
If I am even worth the struggle
That you and all the others
Deal with on a day to day basis
As I lie bold face into your eyes
And tell you that I am
Dying of myself while I slowly become
Ever more entranced by my own sin
Because I play god every day
And I always say no.