I Know

10600587_10204764587811044_3323353174422219428_nby Devin Mitchell Durbin17 Dec 2014

I used to say I couldn't imagine what my life
would be like without
something.

I used to say "I can't imagine my life without
my iPhone/iPad."
Something.

I used to say that about everything.
Every new thing, every new person
every second of every day.
Where have you been my whole life
I don't know where I would be without 
you.

I think in most cases; its too small to matter.
I know. Most times I didn't want to think about the truth.

I have to catch myself from saying;
"I don't know where I'd be if it weren't for Jesus."

Oh, do I know.

Because I know what my life is like with him;
and because often I do not listen
I find myself sitting just on the edge
of a life, that I unfortunately remember living. 
I am only steps away from breaking
and the only reason why I stand here, shaking
is because there is a God who knows better
than I do; because when I do me
I suffer, and hurt myself and everyone around me. 

"I don't know where I'd be if it werent for Jesus."
Oh, but, do I know. 

I thought about it all the time.
The dark corridors upon which I walked;
a man in hiding from himself
close to three kinds of death. 

Theres a reason why I have to hope
even when I'm stuck in sin;
because I know where I'd be without Jesus.
Sometime's I just don't want to think about
the truth.