I’m just going outside for a good healthy smoke,
Escaping the sanctimonious chatter, lest I’ll have to boak.
All this “political correctness” is pure comedic farce,
And their self-righteous twaddle they can blow up their arse.
Naw, gimme a Cuban and a nice steady flame,
I’ll make it glow red and… and if it’s all the same,
I’ll sit with the “banished” in this hinterland of weeded suck,
With my head getting dizzy ‘cos I don’t give a schmuck.
Ah yes, I long for the good healthy smoke,
With a glass of red wine for this old crabbit “soak”;
So bugger off world with your view of what’s right,
I’m happy out here, like a pig in the shite.
I feel better already and my cares are all less,
And my burdens are lighter as I shake off the stress.
I’m chilled and I’m finally at peace with myself,
Induced by no pill I could find on the shelf.
But I know I will reek like a grizzly bears bum,
And the Thought-Police gather to see that I’m hung.
But bugger the lot, and their views they can poke,
For you know what….I’m going to stay out here…
…and have another good…