Read introduction

A poem of contemplation

I Wish

Fdf5205c-8b5b-4da8-a6dc-63fe28d680a9by Billy J. Stewart29 Jan 2015

I wish I wasn’t such a numpty,
Plodding around other peoples conversations with size tens,
Knocking over delicate pots of pretty flowers,
With my obtuse musings.
I wield my opinions sometimes,
Like a blunt instrument of terror.
Ah…that’s me alright!
‘Course, you’ll know all about that already.
I wish I could see with overlooking eyes,
What I see now.
How I hoover up offense at the slightest indiscretion,
Smug in my self-righteous throne,
Ha, not for me to err.
That’s what others do.
Isn’t it? Well isn’t it? Huh..?
I mean…I wish I could listen…
…with my heart.
For in so doing, I guess, I would hear in colour,
And see in sub-woofer quadraphonic stereo.
And if…
If I listened with my heart to you,
Casting my overlooking eyes on your face,
Would you let me in?
Would you share with me your inner beauty?
I wish you would.
Its cold out here, on the outside.
You know, not a day goes by where I don’t remember words,
Once thrown in anger, and caught on the retreat.
Sticks and stone they say.
But what would they know.
I tell you words are the daggers that kill me, slowly,
Over and over again.
But if I had my way I’d make each word a star,
And place it high, to shine and sparkle,
Reflecting tiny pieces of light from far off suns,
For your eyes.
I wish I could, I really do.
Ach it’s easy to while away the day,
And pitter and patter down the minutes of the clock,
Ticking and tocking in self-absorbed vanity.
It’s easy to sit and consider it all, as if I had power I don’t.
I just wish I could live again,
Knowing what I know now,
To make amends.
To heal the past.
I wish I’d just stop forever gazing…
…in this mirror…cracked and broken and chipped at the edges…
Huh… I wish..!