I can't ask you to hold me
and it hurts

it hurts in a way that's unfamiliar,
like my skin aches

I feel like it's okay now,
to want you here
to want you to hold me, so maybe
I won't feel so

I want you to tell me
I look nice today.

I don't feel like it.

I want you to check in -

Slowly

not everything feels dull
anymore

Though I don't recognize myself,
or this

Every glance from you feels inevitably
painful
now, bittersweet?

every message anticipated,

Thinking of you

creates this tension behind my eyes, this
frown, so evident, upon my