Self-loathing:

the subtle realization - first gradual, then

as if a current rushing from your tips
to your ends

untangling whatever it is, that held you together.

you do not have control. you do not have hope. you talk

all you do is talk -

why would you be more, why would you be grateful, why would you use each opportunity

when you can waste away

and crumble

in the dark corners of your mind?